Necessary Evils
by Sleepy Lotus
Summary: Wiling to use any means to get back the man she betrayed and sentenced to death, Elizabeth cuts through her conscience on the journey to World's End. When Jack wakes up, will he forgive her? JE
1. Chapter 1

-1Disclaimer….I don't own anything.

A/N: I'm planning for this to be quite a short fic, only 2 or 3 chapters. More of a focus on emotion than plot. Hope you enjoy.

1.

"You're being stubborn," said Elizabeth haughtily, crossing her arms. She straddled the chair next to Jack's bed in the cabin of the Black Pearl, watching his motionless form. "After all this, you're just going to take a nap?"

She sighed heavily, laying her tired forehead down on arms folded on the back of the chair. _After all this indeed._ "We've gone through a lot to get you back, Jack," she said, moving to sit at his bedside. The captain lay so still, only the faintest breath pulled in and out of his chest indicated every now and then that he wasn't exactly dead. But then again, he didn't seem exactly alive either.

Elizabeth felt at a loss for what to do. It seemed that as long as they could find Jack at World's End, get he and the Pearl back, that all the rest would fall into place. Jack would wake up, and all would be well, or at least even. She'd pursued this goal with such a vicious voracity, fueled by such a burning need to return the Captain back to the land of the living. It seemed maybe all her efforts were for naught. Perhaps this was Jack's revenge on her, to not allow a chance at forgiveness for chaining him to the Pearl.

With the tip of one long finger, she gently traced the lines of his face, and wondered if he could feel it at all, wherever he really was. She spoke softly, as though they were having an intimate conversation, even though it felt more like talking to herself. "I told you I wasn't sorry, when I chained you to the mast of the Pearl. Was I a good liar? Did you believe me? Do you hate me for it now?" His face remained slack, peaceful, unanswering. "I think _I _hate me for it now."

The silence hung heavy in the room. But although it felt as though she were talking to herself, she hoped she really wasn't. She hoped she was helping Jack in some way to come back, giving him a line from the real world to grip, to follow.

"You called me a pirate. I didn't believe you then, but I do now. You wouldn't believe the things I've done, to get you here. If I had any innocence left before this adventure began, any part of the girl I once was, I threw it to the wind. Shattered it into a thousand pieces. Can you imagine, Jack? A governor's daughter, killing a man in cold blood? Killing several? Dead men tell no tales; I did what I knew to be necessary. Can you imagine me seducing a Chinese pirate captain, to steal the charts to World's End in his cabin as he lay sleeping? Now we have a secret, Jack. No one else on this ship knows how I got those charts."

Elizabeth had hoped for some sort of reaction from this, even if it were just a twitch. "Have you nothing to say?" she asked, taking his hand in hers. She felt the cold skin, the calloused fingers and palms, the numerous rings. Many times, she'd thought about how nice it would be, to feel those clever hands on her skin, should they only have the chance once again. "Are you not furious, to know your enemy laid hands on the woman you love, in the most intimate ways? Sao Feng told me of your rivalry. That you two would certainly try to kill each other, if ever faced with the chance again."

Squeezing his hand, she hoped for some sign of life growing in him. She got nothing. "That's another secret we share, Jack. I know you love me." She watched his face, hoping for _something_. But it remained unmoved by anything she said. Tears began to well in her lovely brown eyes. "I know, because I found your journal. And for the rotten pirate I am, I read it, without shame. Shall I refresh your memory of what you wrote, not days before I killed you?"

Hastily wiping the tears away, she slid off the bed, snatched the leather bound captain's log from the table, and sat down next to Jack again. She turned to the page she'd read countless times over, it wasn't as much of a journal entry as letter, or a list of things he felt for her but couldn't say.

"_Lizzie Love, for the rotten pirate I am, let me tell you I'd like nothing more than to kick young Will off this ship, maroon him on an island, and sail away with his fiancee to anywhere we may please. What would you say, I wonder, should I put forth a proper proposal 'fore your pretty little self? You'd laugh at me, I know, maybe even lay a good slap across my cheek. You'd call me a filthy lying pirate, and probably worse. You'd probably laugh at the thought of a scoundrel such as me, hoping to lay me grubby hands on a treasure such as yourself. How could I convince you then, that my dear Lizzie, I would always be nothing but good to you? We're peas in a pod, love, you and I. You're a pirate through and through, and I'll show you what it's like to really be free. You want it, same as you want me. Just wait 'till we're finished with this Davy Jones business, and next it will be _your _heart I chase across the ocean. Maybe I said my one and only love is the sea, but Lizzie love, you are the sea. You're beautiful and dangerous, wild, unfathomable, and I pity the men who think they can tame you. Luckily, I'm not one of them."_

Shutting the journal, Elizabeth ran her fingers over the worn leather cover. Dates indicated he'd kept this journal for years, right up until the Kraken took him to Davy Jones' Locker. There were other entries about her as well: his musings about their first meeting, the way he'd saved her from drowning on the sea floor of the harbor, the wicked thoughts that entered his head when he ripped open her corsette on the dock. Really, it was the first, and not the last time he'd given her a taste of freedom from society's constraints.

Elizabeth thought back on the day she'd forsaken him, chaining him to the mast of the Pearl. She'd thought his earlier marriage proposal had been just a whim, maybe induced by too much rum. Now she wondered if the pirate hadn't thought it out a bit more, even waited for the opportune moment to make his move. He'd known, even anticipated, exactly what she desired in her heart of hearts: freedom, to do as she pleased. She understood the truth of his words now, and scarier yet, understood at least a bit more clearly her own feelings for Captain Sparrow. She knew now that freedom was a dish she wished to taste with him, well and often. She knew her relationship with Will was doomed from the start.

Not that Will talked to her much anymore anyway. She knew he'd witnessed the kiss; even though she'd done it to save all their skins, he wasn't so easily convinced. He insisted he could tell something changed in her, that even if she had coldly condemned Jack to death to save them all, she'd kissed Jack out of her own desire to do so. At the time, she'd been deeply hurt. Now, she knew Will's theory to be utterly accurate, perhaps more so than even he could imagine.

"I can't imagine a world without Captain Jack Sparrow," said Elizabeth quietly, stroking his cheek. "Wake up, Jack. We need you. I need you." She leaned down to lightly kiss his unresponsive lips, willing him to return back to the land of the living. But sheer will didn't seem to be enough, for he still lay motionless, only those shallow breaths disturbing the illusion of death every now and then. Frustrated and feeling powerless against outside forces she had no control of, she rested her head against his chest, and cried.

**Please review!!**


	2. Chapter 2

-1Part 2

A storm raged outside the Pearl, great black waves of the sea tossing the heavy ship as though it were a mere bathtub toy. Few souls dared to face the storm on the deck, only those who's duty it was to keep watch on the ship outside. All the rest of the crew cowered below deck or in their cabin. All except for one defiant woman, who clung to the rigging and faced the storm. In her present state of mind, she didn't care if the sea washed her away into obscurity.

"Come down, Elizabeth!" shouted Will, braving the water washing over the side of the boat to fetch Elizabeth. Perhaps he no longer trusted her, nor even felt he knew her anymore, but he still didn't want to see her dead.

"No," she refused, looking out to the angry sea. "Go away, Will."

"Not without you." He grabbed for her hand, but she dodged his advance, pulling herself away with a firm grip on the rigging.

"You're crazy!"

"I very well may be." _I'm not crazy, just dying. Dying inside._

A particularly violent wave washed over the side, catching Will and nearly taking him over. The sea would have claimed another life, had he not grabbed a hold of the mast with all his strength. "Come with me!" he demanded again.

She only shook her head, and at seeing her response, so did he. Without another word, he retreated back down to the hold with the rest of the crew.

Finally left alone again, Elizabeth turned back to the sea, turning her face up to the cold rain pounding down. She felt at the exact opposite end of hysterics: numbness, cold. All her efforts for the past few months, all her sacrifices, seemed for naught. She thought back on the first day Jack awoke, and wobbly walked out of his cabin. He never granted her a word, only a disdainful look, and refused to speak to her since.

The rain masked the tears welling in her eyes. She could live without Jack, but she didn't want to. After tasting such high adventure, she refused to go back to her normal life in Port Royal. Totally lacking of substance, of _life. _She would be damned if she ever wore corsets again, without getting _something_ out of it besides pain. It was just one of the many things her culture pressed upon women, to keep them helpless, complacent. The exact opposite of her true nature.

And so when the storm rolled in, she went out to face it, wishing to make a bargain with the sea. If she could last the gale, she would take it as a sign of acceptance from the great blue depths, that she could continue to sail her waters until the very day the sea wished to swallow her up. One thing was certain in her mind now: without freedom, she couldn't survive.

A rough hand clasped her arm in a grip of steel. She turned, expecting to see Will again. Instead, a jolt shot through her when she found herself face to face with Captain Jack Sparrow.

"If you don't come in from this storm you'll die," he shouted over the wind matter of factly, voice devoid of emotion.

Elizabeth found herself narrowing her eyes at the captain. "Would you really care, Jack? You haven't said a bloody word to me since waking up." She raised her voice, but fought not to scream with frustration. She glared at him accusingly. After all this, didn't she at least deserve Jack to _tell_ her that he hated her?

He too narrowed his dark eyes, tightening his grip on her arm. They stood in a stand off, neither willing to back down, the rain soaking Jack's clothes to the bone as they tested wills. It surfaced and disappeared so quickly Elizabeth thought she might have dreamt it, but she thought she saw Jack's face soften momentarily before saying, "Come on, love. I don't want to be sayin' no funeral remarks come morning."

Jack tugged at her arm, and Elizabeth relented, letting lose of the rigging to allow him to pull her into his cabin. Even though it couldn't have been more than four meters, it was a treacherous trek from the rigging to the cabin. Once inside, Jack released her with a little push towards one of the chairs at his table.

"And just what remarks would you grace my funeral with, Jack?"

He leaned a hip against the corner of his desk, crossing his arms. "I'd say you were a good pirate but a hellcat of a woman."

Elizabeth sat down gingerly in one of the chairs, flexing her hands. They'd gone numb long ago from the cold and wet of the sea, and seemed to still be fixed in place from clutching the ropes outside. "Am I a good pirate?"

Jack smiled, gold flashing in the candlelight. Really, it resembled more of a baring of teeth. "According to Mr. Gibbs, you were a force to be reckoned with, on the journey to World's End. Did all sorts of unladylike things, I hear." Elizabeth flinched inwardly, but outwardly kept up her façade of stone.

"So do you believe Gibbs?"

"I don't know, love. Should I?" Once, Elizabeth had been secretly proud of her pet name from Jack. _Love_. She'd always felt he meant more by it than he let on. But this time, it sounded acidic rolling off the Captain's tongue.

Jack had changed since coming back from death, there was no doubt about it. And how could a man ever be exactly the same, after seeing the other side? There was something missing, or perhaps something added. A glint of warmth from his eyes, or an icy glint of cold now present. She hadn't heard him laugh since waking up, not once. Oh, and she'd been listening. She didn't think it a thing ever possible, but Jack Sparrow seemed now a bitter, maybe even beaten man. Also, Elizabeth couldn't help but think her betrayal had something to do with this change in Jack. She knew she'd cut him deep; the question was, was it too deep to heal?

"It could be said I did some unladylike things."

Soaked through, Jack peeled his shirt off, tossing it casually to the back of a chair to dry. Elizabeth thought little of it, until he met her gaze, watching for her reaction. She realized then that he was taunting her, parading a body he knew she wished to touch but couldn't before her eyes. _Is that why you brought me back from the edge of washing away with the waves, Jack? To punish me more? _Privy to his game, Elizabeth remained stoic, watching to not give him the pleasure of embarrassing her, but not letting on to the intense sense of longing she felt in her heart. She could see all his scars and tattoos, carved and inked into the lean muscle of his torso.

Elizabeth could tell that her lack of reaction irked Jack, like a child whose fit didn't bring about the desired result. "Elizabeth Swann? Doing unladylike things?" Taking his game a step further, Jack walked over to his sea chest, nonchalantly stripping to his birthday suit to change into a dry set of drawers. She caught an eyeful of a sculpted round rear end, but little else. It didn't shock her, only made her wish he still loved her. "Like what, pray tell? Tell Jack a story worth hearing."

There was a certain note in his tone that put Elizabeth en garde. By whatever means, she wondered if he didn't already know exactly what she'd done: how she'd gotten those charts to World's End, and escaped the _Empress._ Of course this wasn't the first time she and Jack had sparred verbally; but for the first time, she felt as though she were truly walking on a dagger's edge. "There's not really much to tell, or at least not much you'd be interested in hearing."

Playing Jack's same game, Elizabeth stripped off her shirt, leaving only a thin white cotton undershirt that stuck to her like a second skin. She hung her shirt on the back of the chair. Jack's gaze roved over her when he turned back around, and she felt pleased she evoked more of a reaction from him than he her. Seeming to realize this, Jack huffed, as a mad bull blows hot air from its nostrils.

"I doubt that." Jack returned to his leaning place against the table, seeming to enjoy towering over her. "So what does Will think of his bonnie lass turning into a such a fierce pirate?"

Unable to stand the intensity of those dark eyes, Elizabeth looked away, out the port window to the storm still raging outside, mirroring what Jack obviously felt within. "Will doesn't speak to me much lately, if you haven't noticed. It's a treatment I seem to be getting a lot from the men I care about." It was the closest she'd ever come to admitting to Jack's face that she loved him.

"Well, in that case I reckon' you can do whatever you be wantin' then, eh?"

"I suppose," she answered, unenthused. What she wanted, was him. No, that wasn't exactly true. She wanted the old Jack back. The unsinkable, indomitable Captain Jack Sparrow.

"You know," said Jack, looking at her slyly. "I've always heard Sao Feng guarded those charts to World's End like a buccaneer guards his rum. Kept 'em locked up in 'is cabin, I believe he did. Just how did you get your pretty hands on those?" Jack baited her, and baited her well.

"Don't ask questions you don't want the answer to, Jack. You have no idea the…necessary evils I committed to get you back."

He smirked, and at that moment Elizabeth wanted to slap the smile off of his face. "I recon' it had a bit to do with Sao Feng's fancy for ye, the delicious morsel you be. Come now, lass, did ol' Fengy do you right?"

Elizabeth didn't know how Jack found out, to her knowledge no one on board knew exactly how. Perhaps he figured it out himself, clever man that he was. But for all his taunting, Jack gave Elizabeth a weapon: in an unguarded moment, she read the jealousy plain as day in his eyes.

Standing from her chair, she went to stand before Jack, nose to nose. "And what if he did?" she asked in a quiet voice full of venom. "What if I enjoyed myself thoroughly, Jack? Are you disappointed you didn't get the chance first?"

She saw it in his eyes, a second before he snapped; Elizabeth had no time to escape. Grabbing her wrist roughly, Jack flung her over to the bed. He straddled her, holding her down with his weight and hands over her delicate wrists. With a warning she may have had a chance, but as it was Elizabeth couldn't fight Jack's brute strength. Still, she tried, writhing beneath him, attempting to twist free. Jack smiled wickedly, obviously enjoying her struggles beneath him. He slipped a knee between her legs to grind his hips against hers, and a rush of adrenaline shot through her body. She could feel his warm skin through the thin shirt, the way his body molded to hers, and for the moment she couldn't decide which emotion ruled, fear or desire. "Is that what you like, lizzy girl? Rough pirate hands on that pristine body o' yours?"

"You seem to know well that I'm no longer pristine."

"With just one tumble in the hay? You've got a ways to go yet, love."

Furious and trapped, Elizabeth nearly managed to throw Jack off her hips with an unexpectedly powerful arch of her back. Grounding himself again, he lay flatter across her body, so their faces hovered not inches away. Looking to his eyes, Elizabeth feared all she would see was hatred. However, all she could find was pain.

"And what if I told you I enjoyed every moment with Sao Feng, because I pretended his every touch was from your hands? What would you say to that?"

Jack leaned down to whisper in her ear, "I'd say I was flattered, love, that you held me so high in your thoughts, even after killing me."

"You'll never forgive me, will you? Is this what death does to a man? Turns a great soul into the bitterest, most unpleasant sea dog who ever sailed the sea?"

"No love, it's what betrayal does to a man, when the woman he trusted most sentences him to die."

Elizabeth smiled bitterly. "Is that so, Jack? Should I be bitter then too, for I saw you row away from the ship as the Kraken began its assault against the Pearl."

"I came back!" hissed Jack angrily. "I came back, because I couldn't stand the thought of you being devoured whole by that slimy sea beast, and what I got for it was the kiss of Judas."

"And I brought _you_ back," retorted Elizabeth, with just as much fire. "What more can I do? What do you want from me?"

Jack pulled back to look in her eyes, searching. He slowly calmed, until just his weight held her down on the bed, and she could feel his heart pounding steadily against her chest. "I don't know what I want. If I wanted to reciprocate the favor, I would have let the storm have you tonight. I thought I might want revenge, but it don't seem to sit right with me. So, you might be the death of me yet, love. Here I am, feelin' as though I'm dying all over again from a hole in my heart you carved with those pretty hands o' yours."

With a deep sigh, Jack rolled off of Elizabeth, propping his head on his hand, looking down at her. She stared up at him, befuddled, not sure how to respond. Was she lying to herself, or had those flinty eyes softened? The question still hovered in her mind: _what do you want from me? _Because if he would let her, she wanted to give him everything.

Seeing Elizabeth lay speechless next to him, Jack went on, "I know you read my journal, Lizzy. I heard everything you said to me, the first night you all took the Pearl from World's End. It was a form of torture in itself, hearing your voice, feeling you touch me, and only able to dream about you."

Elizabeth pressed her lips together, in anguish, longing to hold him but also afraid. The anger and bitterness he'd expressed earlier, seeming to just leave behind a heartbroken pirate. She reached out a hand to touch his cheek, but stopped half way, clutching her hand closed. He stared at her hand, frozen in mid air. "Forgive me, Jack. To say I wasn't sorry when I left you for the kraken was the greatest lie I've ever told."

Jack reached up to clasp her hand, his long fingers curling around hers. "And if I forgive you? What then?" he murmured against her skin, before planting a gentle kiss upon the back of her hand. "Would you leave the whelp and your doddy life of comfort behind, to sail the high sea with a rotten pirate?" His lips moved from the back of her hand to the sensitive skin of her wrist, and onward as he waited for her answer.

Closing her eyes, she reveled in his gentle touch, but in a way feared it was only the calm before another storm. "Is that an invitation? Or are you waiting for my eager agreement, only to say you'd be damned to sail with a wretch like me? It's a punishment I surely deserve."

"I suppose you'll just have to say yes, and find out."

She closed her eyes, a sigh that shook her entire body escaping from her. "Yes," she pleaded. "Take it or leave it, Jack Sparrow, but I'm here for you and you alone to take as I am."

Hearing no response, Elizabeth opened her eyes to find Jack leaning over her, their lips tauntingly close. "I have but one request from the pirate who killed me," he murmured, breath whispering across her skin. "Be the woman who heals me."

Elizabeth reached up to bury her fingers in Jack's hair, feeling the warmth of his skin against her hand. "We have an accord, Captain."

Unable to contain himself any longer, he fell upon her with ravenous lips and hands. Both of the lovers trembled as they explored each other's bodies, a treasure so long sought and finally won.


End file.
